I did not go to bed until about 8:00AM so there was not much to the day. I slept most of the light away. Goes that way sometimes. I am really trying to get on a schedule where I sleep at night, but it is not working well. I hate the havoc reversing day and night plays with my life. However, I managed to get quite a few things into this space during the early morning hours.
Alex, my sixteen year old son, has to go back to school tomorrow after the long weekend. I always feel a little sad sending him off to school. I like for him to be at home. I can imagine how I will feel if he goes in the Marines as he plans. I don’t like to think about it too much. No need to worry before it happens… I do though, I worry about his going to Iraq and the damage combat would do to his psyche. He is a sensitive person and a caring person, could he handle all that?
Both our computers are working well now. No thanks to HP, MSN, and Microsoft tech support. I had to figure out the problems on my own. I am becoming pretty good at solving issues. I never thought I would be working with hardware and setting up wireless networks, but I have done both. Software problems are the ones that cause the most hassle, but I have learned to troubleshoot most issues and I know where to obtain information to help me fix things. Wish I was as good at handling life… still have a long way to go in that category.
I think things would be easier if there were not so many stesses. My mother with her Parkinson’s, frequent mini-strokes, and other illnesses is not doing well at all. I have most of the responsibiility for her and sometimes it is trying, and I worry… what if something happens that I cannot handle, will I know what to do? I love her dearly and want to do what is right.
Money is the other big stress. I just do not have enough. Alex wants and I buy, then I look at the debt mounting and I wonder… If I worry too much about it I will go berserk and nobody needs that. Even though I am weak I hold things together and make sure everything gets done. It is a lot of responsibility.
I do not know if this is the kind of writing that goes in blogs, but it is my truth, and sometimes just telling it helps keep me going. I guess that is the best something like this could do.
Guess that is all for now…
Always,
Jo Ann
Chronicles 