Creative Journal – Entry Three – Follow Your Nose

Thursday, October 15, 2009

The smell of Mr. Clean with Febreze is drifting around the house. Mom mopped the washroom and kitchen a few minutes ago. The scent is fresh and clean. Soon the smell of Downy will be drifting from the washroom because I am washing a load of reds. Mom brought home a bunch of dirty clothes from her trip and I usually do the washing because I am better at caring for clothes. I do not like ironing so Mom irons her own clothes. I should iron some of mine, but I hate ironing. Mom used to do some ironing for me occasionally, but her legs have gotten weaker and she can hardly stand to iron her own clothes. Mom has neuropathy in her legs and feet. She cannot feel her feet most of the time and stumbles quite often.

A jar candle is burning and when I walk past it, I can smell its sweet scent. Mom must have lit it before I woke up this morning. She woke up about 7:00 and I did not get up until 8:15. I guess I was exhausted from not sleeping much over the past few days. I think Ko-Ko was to blame for my sleeping less. She woke me repeatedly during the nights and early mornings. Mom is planning on going off for several days next week so I had better try to catch up on my sleep while I can. I mention the puppy dogs often in my writing because they are such an integral part of my life. That is the reason I shared their pictures with the Journal Writing group today.

I am so happy that I became active in the Journal Writing group again. I am enjoying the contact with other members. I have written a journal entry almost every day since becoming a regular contributor again. This is great because I am writing daily. I hope that the practice will soon lead me into writing poetry again. I do not think I have written a poem since I wrote the tribute to my brother, James. I read that at James’ memorial service. I am so glad I chose to share the poem with my brother before he died. He never thought much of my writing, but he said the poem was nice. I think I will include it here.

Sonnet to My Hero, My Brother, James

Even though the times now grow dreary cold

I cannot deny him his worthy rest

For all his trying days he never sold

His heart out to any worldly request.

No matter how harsh the times he ever

Kept his full dignity from being lost,

And throughout rough winter and tough summer

He always counted honor worth the cost.

I will find it hard on that tomorrow

When his mortal coil shall finally break,

But shall his soul’s fine example follow

And live my life always fully awake.

For he has been my hero true and strong

My brother, I shall revere my lifelong.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Monday, October 13, 2008

I probably should write new poems here, but I have not written one in such a long time. I guess I will have to read one of my books on writing poetry. Maybe that would help inspire me. It has been a year and two days since I wrote a poem, that is shameful because poetry is my main creative gift. I should make an effort to write a poem, but I do not seem inspired. I go through periods like this from time to time. Writing every day will help make it easier, I hope.

Always,

Jo Ann

Creative Journal – Entry Two – Creative Thinking

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Creative thinking is thinking beyond the constraints of what I should, or ought, to think. I am able to travel anywhere in my mind and think of anything I please. I have no limits. Coming up with unique and outlandish thoughts is acceptable and even good. I can write from this place of safety and non-judgment. Sometimes my thoughts get predictable and are not very creative. It is then that I find myself unable to write or create anything of worth. Often I want some inspiration to bring myself into a creative state of mind. My everyday life is not always inspirational and I cannot necessarily pull inspiration into myself.

Creative thinking solves problems and moves me beyond my normal experience. It helps me deal with the issues of my life. Even when I am not inspired, some measure of creativity informs my days. I would face infinite boredom were I not a creative person. I have to think creatively to move beyond a constant sense of depression and defeatism. Creative thinking is optimistic, seeing the good in even mundane situations. Creative thinking makes walking Hope on the same path repeatedly into an adventure. It makes the subtle changes in scenery and the attitude of the dog a delight. Creative thinking makes routine tasks interesting and worthwhile. It gives me gifts of insight and encouragement. Ordinary things become extraordinary when viewed creatively. Creative thinking allows me to move outside myself and look at things from different perspectives. I can see more than one side of a problem when I engage creatively.

Last night I went to bed about 11:45 and woke at 5:50 this morning. With Mom gone, I have to sleep with both Hope and Ko-Ko. Ko-Ko is only five months old and wants to play early in the morning. She woke me licking my face. Even so, I had a lot more sleep than the night before and I feel better this morning.

The funeral for Terry went well yesterday. June is coping well. I feel so sorry for her, but I know Mom’s being with her is a great comfort. I am glad to watch over things here while Mom is away. She will not be coming home until Wednesday afternoon at the earliest.

It is nice to have the house to myself. I can do whatever pleases me. I am not too constrained when Mom is home. Some of her habits like running the television so much are a little annoying. She eats on an earlier schedule than I like and I usually feel obliged to eat when she does so we can share our meals. I am listening to more music, and at a higher volume, than I am able to when she is home. I eat when I get hungry and that works well for me too.

This morning I finished reading Creative Journal Writing by Stephanie Dowrick. I read the whole book and am going back to do all the excellent exercises. It will take months to finish them. I found this a very inspiring book. I am handling the process a little differently than she suggests. I am journaling on the laptop and she recommends writing free hand in a paper-based journal. She recommends keeping the journal completely private and I am sharing mine with the Journal Writing group. I guess as with most things I have to take what works for me and disregard the rest. I may even eventually post some of what I write here on my blog. I need to bring the blog up to date and post regular entries there. I have rather neglected it for some time.

I kept my weekly food journal for one week. It is interesting to look back over what I have eaten. Writing down my consumption limits it. I find it amusing that it works that way, but I do not want to eat as much so I will not have to write down great quantities of food. It would be embarrassing to have a huge list, even with only me looking at the journal. I am one weird person.

Well that is all for now. I have to get dressed and walk Hope while there is a break in the rain.

Always,

Jo Ann

Creative Journal – Entry One – Free Associations
Monday, October 12, 2009

I am reading Creative Journal Writing by Stephanie Dowrick, which I have had for months, but have not opened since I bought it at Borders. I will be doing exercises from this book. I hope that working through these will cause my creativity to flow. I have not written freely in months.

I am writing more since I began participating in the Journal Writing group frequently. I have been a member of the group for years, but have rarely participated. I decided participating might nudge me in the direction of actually journaling.

Journaling is a form of writing I enjoy, but I think what I am actually aiming for is more creative writing like poetry, stories, essays, and possibly even a novel. I am seriously considering NanoWriMo this year. I only have absolutely no idea what I will write about in the novel. I have the idea I worked on in the past, but I do not know that I could get any further with it this year than I have before.

Mom is gone with June so the puppy dogs and I have the house to ourselves. I have turned the iPod in the SoundDock to some instrumental music, which makes a great background for reading and writing. Steven Halpern’s music is grand accompaniment to quiet pursuits. I have several of his CDs loaded on the iPod. They are somewhat new age and inspirational.

Often when Mom is home, I cannot play music because she runs the television constantly. I am not a television person. This season I have found several shows I like to watch in the evenings, but I feel somewhat like I am wasting my time while watching them. Reading seems much more a worthwhile activity.

I considered again working my way through 40 Days and 40 Nights, which is a Guided Journal by Ilene Segalove. I could not muster the stamina for such an undertaking just now. I loved what I accomplished with it when I used it a few years ago. I have those entries saved on the old desktop computer.

I have found it is easier for me to journal on the computer than free hand. I have some beautiful blank books I have collected over the years, but I hardly used them. The collection just takes up a lot of space in my over cluttered room. I should really stop buying blank books, but seem unable to resist beautiful designs.

The clutter in my room is just about to make it unusable. Over nine years of living here, I have collected a lot of stuff. I seem unable to part with any of it so it just keeps piling up. I guess I am a pack rat. If I had more room, it would not be a bad thing.

The clutter is what had almost completely stopped me from using my old desktop computer. The chair at my desk in there was always full of clothes and I hated having to move them to sit down and compute.

I have many instructional books on writing that I have not read. I pick new ones up from time to time at Borders. I tend to read the library books more frequently because I know they must be returned and I know books I have bought will always be here. It is another of the groups of things I collect.

It is raining here and has been since I woke up at 2:48 this morning. I hope it does not cause flooding like a few weeks ago. I am worried that people who have just begun to recover their lives may face disaster again.

I think I have written enough for now. I do not know that I did the free associations as I should, but I made the attempt.

Always,
Jo Ann

Alex deployed to Iraq on February 6th. He came home for some days at the end of January. We enjoyed seeing him. Mom and I drove him back to Cherry Point, North Carolina.

Things have been busy here. We have had appointments and errands that had us in town. I went to have my eyes examined last Friday and found out that I had not had an eye exam since 2002. These contacts have lasted a long time.

I hope all of you are well. Mom is having some trouble with her stimulator and with pulled tendons in her right ankle. She is wearing the orthopedic boot she wore when she broke her ankle in 2006. I am doing fairly well.

Always,

Jo Ann